I sat in the back of the cab, listening to melancholy Chinese love ballads emanate from the radio.  And staring past the expanse of whizzing flashes of bright neon lights that make up Beijing’s skyline at night, I was overcome. 

Loneliness. 

Sharp, sudden and encompassing.  I was on my way home from a black tie charity ball held at the China World, one of the more famous 5 star luxury hotels in town. Since I had helped with some of the event’s marketing, I was extended an invitation. Honestly, I haven’t felt really lonely in a long time, the emotion almost didn’t register. I guess it was a result of seeing all the couples, mostly older, dressed in their finest, holding their champagne and looking quite contented in eachother's company that caused this most unexpected sentiment. Perhaps being in a foreign country for an extended period of time, absent of family, friends, and boyfriend will do it to you too.  An event with such deliciously decadent food and wine should have been much more enjoyable.  

Nonetheless, never go to a ball dateless if your name isn’t Cinderella and if Prince Charming isn't waiting to sweep you off your feet.

Autumn is my absolute favorite time of year. The combination of cool, crisp air and the smell of freshly fallen leaves after a bit of rain is intoxicating. I especially love digging deep into my closet and dusting off the sweaters of winter and putting away the tank tops of summer. It’s like a happy reunion with old friends, seeing my sweaters. One of the things that I really missed, while living in the middle of the desert in Tucson for college, was seeing the come and go of the four seasons. Even cacti and palm trees can lose their appeal after a while.

Autumn, or qiu tian as they call it here, has finally begun in Beijing. Even though there aren’t nearly enough trees lining the crowded smog filled streets in the city, it is still invigorating to see the beginnings of the seasonal change.I went out the other day, and gone was unrelentingly I can’t breathe because I’m sweating so much I stink and don't want to smell myself humidity. The air had a gloriously refreshing chill to it. At first I thought it too good to last, but it has been continuing, thank God. So, I have decided to perhaps venture out and explore some of the more touristy parts of the capital city in lieu of the fortuitous weather. There is so much history here. Added bonus: the masses of tourists- the ones sporting conspicuous tour group issued identifying fluorescent hats that follow a flag toting tour guide like the pied piper- will likely be absent, yay! .(Summer is the height of the tourist season here.)

So Michele will finally get to learn more about her cultural background.

Day before yesterday, 8:35 p.m.: the lights go out in my bedroom. The tv flicks off, and the incessant chatter of Chinese infomercials selling skin whitening crèmes stop. The silence is overwhelming. In the sudden darkness, panic hits.  What the hell’s going on here?...  After frantically trying the light switch, tv, and radio, I realize, no power. Then I start to wonder why. Is it just me that has no electricity? Did I blow a fuse, running so many things at once? If so, how do you fix that? Or has my power been cut? Did I forget to pay the electricity bill? What’s the date today? When was the bill due? How long will I have to live like this, in the complete darkness?  

Then there’s a commotion outside my door, I can hear it despite the wind and rain.  It’s the neighbors; they are congregating outside in the hallway, upset, and wondering what has interrupted the watching of their favorite cheesy kung fu action soap opera. The maid goes out to check out the situation. Evidently, the whole complex is in the same boat. This makes me a little less anxious. My maid eventually finds matches and birthday candles- yes those tiny short ones- and proceeds to light them one by one in my room. Surprisingly they did a pretty good job, if only for a short time.

In the warm glow of the candlelight, I wondered what life would be like without electricity. Life might be simpler. But then I think, my life is already simple enough.  Do I need more simplicity?....

Then it dawns on me. No electricity means no internet, no tv, no dvds, no light even. Scary. Strange how easily accustomed we get to things. I remember the time when the internet was a new thing, and chatting online with strangers wasn’t scary, but exciting. Oh how times have changed. Why is it that ‘new’ is always fresh and exhilarating?  

Alright, enough rambling… off to dinner!